Set Everyone Free, Get a Dog

Hajir Lesani

Feb 7, 2026

If you love someone, set them free. If you hate someone, set them free. Basically, just set everybody free, fuck it. Get a dog, people are annoying.

🏷️people🏷️dogs🏷️cynical humor🏷️relationships🏷️relatable

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Hajir Lesani

Sometimes when I'm depressed, I take a pregnancy test. So I can go, 'huh, at least I'm not pregnant!'

🏷️relatable🏷️self-deprecating🏷️coping mechanism🏷️depression💀Dark Humor

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Hajir Lesani

Why is parking a car like finding a girlfriend? All the good ones are taken, so you just stick it in the disabled one and hope no one finds out.

🏷️relationships🏷️parking🏷️adult-humor🏷️dating💀Dark Humor

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Hajir Lesani

My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side. So I crashed the car. And then ignored her all day for no reason.

🏷️marriage🏷️sarcasm🏷️relationships🏷️men💀Dark Humor

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